tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20589943.post116051284654585848..comments2023-10-30T09:04:00.112-04:00Comments on Tales of a Bi "MWM": Spinning The WheelNatehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13642480079983859304noreply@blogger.comBlogger5125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20589943.post-1160598407493363142006-10-11T16:26:00.000-04:002006-10-11T16:26:00.000-04:00Nate -I don't mean this to be condescending, but I...Nate -<BR/><BR/>I don't mean this to be condescending, but I'm not sure you can ... or rather I'm not sure you should ... position life as a game. Particularly a game of chance. To some degree I think if forces individuals to take sides. <BR/><BR/>I'd much rather be supportive of all the players.<BR/><BR/>I also think Dane made a very perceptive comment back on your post of 3/9. <I>"... being bisexual doesn't mean you're going to cheat. As you point out, regardless of sexual definition, attraction doesn't go away, but if you're in a monogamous relationship, then the work isn't to stop being attracted, but to control your impulses."</I> (... assuming Carrie is going to require a monogamous relationship and you agree with that).<BR/><BR/> - - - - - - -<BR/><BR/>Drew and Woe -- it's great to hear from you!Paulhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11877772974936424670noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20589943.post-1160557870895158182006-10-11T05:11:00.000-04:002006-10-11T05:11:00.000-04:00I could only echo what is already said.I do believ...I could only echo what is already said.<BR/><BR/>I do believe you have an exceptional wife .Anthonyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17900665225207683233noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20589943.post-1160554098271873392006-10-11T04:08:00.000-04:002006-10-11T04:08:00.000-04:00(Hurray! Drew's still around!!)Drew and Troll's co...(Hurray! Drew's still around!!)<BR/>Drew and Troll's comments make a heck of a lot of sense to me.<BR/>I see how this is a lot like gambling, but only as long as you stay "undecided." It doesn't have to be like that. You both can decide what you want and figure it out together, then it's not this game of chance but a planned decision that would have the best options for both. (Easier said than done of course.) I also believe this is do-able considering your good relationship and open communication...<BR/>I'm a little suspicious about some of the phrases like: "putting your life back together" and "step back" mixed with your "I've waited 30 years" phrase...not sure if they all can exist exclusively. I believe it'll be more like a "discovery" or something completely "new."bearhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17303698155753090199noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20589943.post-1160516789784837262006-10-10T17:46:00.000-04:002006-10-10T17:46:00.000-04:00Nate:You know where this is coming from, and there...Nate:<BR/><BR/>You know where this is coming from, and therefore how much credibility to give it. But gambling is not something to do with a heart, let alone two. <BR/><BR/>You have an incredible advantage in that your wife is willing to contemplate staying, and that you are not [that I've noticed] talking about an emotional connection to another man, which is was brought death to our relationship. You have to decide what you want, and then she has to decide if she can live with it. Until you know what you want -- and finding that out may mean talking to her a lot -- you will be doing something even more dangerous than gambling.<BR/><BR/>You are both in my thoughts and prayers, thoug neither are particularly together these days. I don't know if either of YOU pray, but this might not be a bad time to try. <BR/><BR/>yr<BR/>T@CAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20589943.post-1160514509088481282006-10-10T17:08:00.000-04:002006-10-10T17:08:00.000-04:00Well, it also sounds like an issue of control, and...Well, it also sounds like an issue of control, and being in control of what you want and your own future. If you take the gamble route, and let the chips fall as they may, you are deciding to let Carrie make the decision for you. Visa versa, and you are making the decision for her.<BR/><BR/>I hope that you can try and decide together. Figure out what you both want, and see if you can both live within that framework. If not, then you can both decide what's best for you are individuals, and as a couple.<BR/><BR/>OK, I know this sounds like risk management applied to a marriage -- and maybe this is a stretch but I do believe it is do-able. Good luck, Nate.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com